Want to lose weight during this holiday season?

I've got just the thing for you: keep this piece of writing by Drew Sillery handy.

"Please don't eat me" (as if written by a turkey)

"Please don't eat me. Eat anything instead. You should not eat me because I will get homesick and I won't be good. I still won't be any good if I'm away because I'll have diarrhea. I don't want to have diarrhea."